Everything's Changing

My adorable little bunny!

It looks like she's saying, "MOMMY, I'M NOT LISTENING!"
Do you all remember doing this to ur mother?



I love her so much!

Washing up after licking the beaters


I had to make a cake for work and this was the only way to get her to cooperate!

Jasey is constantly growing and changing. Her new word is UH-OH and she likes to drop things on purpose so she can say it. She's also likes drinking out of our water bottles. Right before bed tonight she went to daddy's nightstand and got his water bottle down and crawled with it in one hand to me for a drink. She loves water; she drank the whole thing! She's feeding herself with untensils. She's much better at a fork, but we're getting there on the spoon. She holds the spoon different and refuses to let me show her the proper way to hold it. She's using her left hand to hold things; makes me wonder if she's going to be a lefty. If she is; she will have gotten that from Jason's side; his mom is a lefty. The PAT teacher said they can use both right up until kindergarten, so we still have a few years until we'll know for sure!

I sit back and think of how much she's grown. Just a little over a year ago she was a brand new baby. All she did was eat, sleep and dirty diapers. I'd lay on the couch with her wrapped up in a blanket in my arms. I think of those days and get teary-eyed! But now I have this unbelievably intelligent toddler who refuses to walk :) She's very much a Mommy's Girl right now. She'll sit in my lap for a story or two and to be rocked before bed time. I see how she learns something new everyday and not only does it excite her, but Jason and I as well. When I look at her I see this little lady; her features are so advanced! I'm so proud of her everytime she does something new.

I just worry if I'm taking it all in. I don't want to forget one little detail. I try to write everything in her babybook and I try to take a million pictures so that she never feels/thinks for one little second she's not loved. Lately she's kept me so busy that I haven't been taking as many pictures; it makes me feel bad. I don't want to let her down; I want to be a great mommy! I worry; did she get enough milk today, (such an adventure getting milk down a child after the bottle goes bye-bye!) did she have juice, what about brushing her teeth? There are so many things anymore to do for her; it's unbelievable.

I have no energy anymore; which I thought was just b/c of Jasey being so active. I usually run on about 4 hours of sleep and make it through the day. Over the past few months I'd been so tired I could barely make it through work. I started going to bed earlier and still no change. My disposition and emotions have been like a roller coaster. I had started to think maybe I had a late case of PPD. I was definitely a different person; very unhappy, sad and depressed. Jason finally talked me into going to the Dr. last Friday. The Dr. thinks I have thyroid problems. He said 9 out of 10 women have thyroid problems, especially after all the changes that your body goes through during pregnancy. I had blood work, test and urine analysis ran on Monday. I go back this Friday to find out my results.

I'm very scared! I want things to go back to normal. I feel like my world has been turned upside down. I've always been a overweight but otherwise very healthy. Ever since having Jasey the weight has gotten worse. Before I got pregnant I had lost 39 lbs and was very happy where I was at on our wedding day. But now even running every night the weight hasn't went down, but up instead. I'm very snippy at Jason; the poor guy doesn't know what to do to help. He's such an amazing husband; I thank God everyday for him. At one point it had really drove a wedge between us. We weren't talking; me b/c I was sad/disapointed/depressed and him b/c he was afraid of getting his head bit off. Now that I know something's wrong; we're doing well. I was so ashamed to admit I had something wrong. So please, any prayers you have for me; I'd love to have. I really need to get healthy for my baby girl and my wonderful husband!